dear daughters: 5 good reasons to be ‘fat’

dear daughters … is a series where I talk to my girls about stuff. I’d like to invite you to talk about stuff too.

dear daughters …

We don’t talk about this a lot. Because honestly I hate how much time we, as women, spend talking about food and dieting. I wish we could simply make peace with food and exercise. I wish we could spend our time enjoying both. I think they’re both gifts from God.

Before I get on with the five good reasons to be ‘fat’ … let me define what I mean by ‘fat.’ I don’t mean exceedingly obese. By ‘fat’ I mean curvy. Womanly. I mean the kind of ‘fat’ you’d see in art like this.

woman in a tub degas 1883And this.

manet woman in a tub 1878These curvy gals would have trouble wearing skinny jeans. Looks like they have ‘muffin tops.’ And for sure, they’d put their hands on their hips in photos to make their arms look skinnier. Probably wouldn’t be called ‘fit’ by their peers and I bet they’d consider themselves ‘fat.’


It’s not actually fat at all. It’s womanly. Curvy. And looks pretty healthy to me. You know what I mean?

So now:

5 Good Reasons to be Fat

  1. To make a baby: Experts say you need a certain percentage of body fat to make a baby. Not sure what it is for you. Only know you need some. I also know (because a nutrition professor told me at Baylor back in the day) excessive dieting and/or purging can wreck your body for babies. It was a wake up call for me. Because I was a mess in college. Only thinking about me and my body. Not you. I’m grateful for that professor. Her truth broke an unhealthy habit for me. Just know this: What you are doing to your body right now will affect the health of your future babies.
  2. To sustain a baby: One day, God willing, you’ll have a baby and nurse a baby. And I want to tell you right now … there is no time in your whole life quite like it. To have that little one swaddled up close. Gracious. I still remember how sweet. But you need to know nursing means surrendering your body to that little someone. It’s a time you might feel ‘fat.’
  3. To get well physically: There might be times in life when you need to let your body just be to get well. I’m actually in one of those seasons. My bout with RSD makes me rest a lot. And not push so hard. The meds I’m taking have a reputation for causing weight gain. And yep. I got it. But this season of rest and medication won’t last forever. I’ll get back in fighting shape. For now though, I’m healing. Feeling ‘fat’ and healing.
  4. To test whether a man really loves you: Just joking! This is not a reason to get fat. BUT I do have to say, it’s a good test of a man. Don’t marry a guy who obsesses about your weight. Please, please, please.
  5. To get well emotionally: When I was about your age, I let the bathroom scale tell me how to feel about myself. One pound up or down determined whether I loved my body that day. Whether I felt good about myself. Letting the scale set your day a hard way to live. If the scale determines your worth, then the scale is your god. An idol. Don’t let a 12″ x 12″ piece of plastic on the floor tell you how to feel about yourself. May I suggest Goodwilling that scale and calling a therapist?

K, now. I love you. I love the way God made you and your body. And I love me and the way God made my body. Little prayers continually for you and me. That we enjoy food, exercise and the seasons God has for us. Prayers that we’ll be kind to ourselves and marvel at our beautiful, curvy bodies. Grateful for their resiliency. Isn’t it a wonder when you think about it?

Your thoughts?