Outside of Anxiety

I’ve had a lot of anxiety the last couple weeks.  A lot. So much that I became somewhat of a freak the other night.

Went something like this. My 18 year old did something that made me upset and I raised my voice at her.  At the barn, in front of people.  Then I called a friend crying. Then later that day, I walked in the house and fell apart because someone inadvertently unloosened a system I had in place at home.

I felt embarrassed over my behavior but I still felt the anxiety creeping in like a cat. So the next morning, I did something that calmed me more than anything else I’ve done in days.

I walked outside with my morning coffee … looked up at the sky … and told God that I was grateful he was in charge of me. And my life.

Stepping outside in the quiet before all the monsters rush in – gave me peace I hadn’t felt in days.

Grateful for the sky. The trees. The birds. The order that abounds in creation.

And grateful most of all for the Creator that made it all.